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Unless you’re one of those rare lucky dog owners whose pooch is pooping daisies and rainbows, you know all about brown, stinky piles you need to scoop. Unfortunately, just pulling out a doggy poop bag is not always going to cut it. You need to familiarize yourself with your doggy’s doo-doo.

The next time you take out your furball to do his business, prepare yourself to stalk their stool. This may tell you a few things about your dog you didn't know about.

1. 50 Shades of poop

Dog Poop Facts
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… and unfortunately, it doesn’t end with brown.

 

2. Size does matter

Dog Poop Facts
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It’s a no-no if it looks like pellet… And if it looks like an elephant did it.

 

3. Poop doubles as a snack

Dog Poop Facts
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Yup, it’s gross, but it seems dogs think it’s delicious. Please don’t check for yourself.

 

3. Poop shape (Hint: it doesn’t look like an emoji)

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After looking at so much log-like poop, you might become a timbersexual.

 

4. From puddles to Play-Doh

Shitpost chart cake

Don’t pretend you can’t feel the consistency of the poop through the baggie.

 

5. Unidentified poop object sightings

Dog Poop Facts
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In most cases, you’ll wish you can’t identify what’s lurking from the pile of poop.

 

6. Stop and smell…the roses?

Dog Poop Facts
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Just kidding. Prepare to embrace the stinkiness.

 

7. Poop stare is a real thing

Quick while the Americans are eating breakfast, lets show them dog poop

I guess is better to look them in the eyes than the alternative option, right?

 

8. Beware of the revenge poop

Plotting my Revenge Poop

Next time you take your doggo to the vet, make sure to check your bed for surprises.

 

9. Roomba and dog poop don’t mix

Roomba vs Puppy Poop

Dog poop is the one challenge even robots can’t overcome.

 

10. You'll never see white poop of your childhood again

Dog Poop Facts
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It’s funny how the weirdest things can make us feel nostalgic.

 

11. Always expect seconds

Pooping Deal With It GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY

You that moment when you’ve just dropped the baggie in the thrash, and your doggo poops out a marble they’ve been holding in for special occasions like these? Yeah, me too.

 

12. You don’t know horror until you experience the turd dangle

Dog Poop Facts
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Deciding whether to remove it yourself or wait for your dog to smear it over their butt is almost worse than Sophie’s Choice.

 

13. Their poop might give you creepy crawlies

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And I mean that literally.

 

14. Doggie butt compass can show you the way

Arctic Explorer Dog from aww

Next time you are lost in the mountains, just ask your shitty little navigator to poop.

 

15. You need to pick it up as a champ

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Unless you want to risk reincarnating as doggy doo.

FULL LIST: Top 50 Best Dog Pooper Scoopers

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The 15 Dog Poop Facts