Unless you’re one of those rare lucky dog owners whose pooch is pooping daisies and rainbows, you know all about brown, stinky piles you need to scoop. Unfortunately, just pulling out a doggy poop bag is not always going to cut it. You need to familiarize yourself with your doggy’s doo-doo.
The next time you take out your furball to do his business, prepare yourself to stalk their stool. This may tell you a few things about your dog you didn’t know about.
1. 50 Shades of poop
… and unfortunately, it doesn’t end with brown.
2. Size does matter
It’s a no-no if it looks like pellet… And if it looks like an elephant did it.
3. Poop doubles as a snack
Yup, it’s gross, but it seems dogs think it’s delicious. Please don’t check for yourself.
3. Poop shape (Hint: it doesn’t look like an emoji)
After looking at so much log-like poop, you might become a timbersexual.
4. From puddles to Play-Doh
Don’t pretend you can’t feel the consistency of the poop through the baggie.
5. Unidentified poop object sightings
In most cases, you’ll wish you can’t identify what’s lurking from the pile of poop.
6. Stop and smell…the roses?
Just kidding. Prepare to embrace the stinkiness.
7. Poop stare is a real thing
I guess is better to look them in the eyes than the alternative option, right?
8. Beware of the revenge poop
Next time you take your doggo to the vet, make sure to check your bed for surprises.
9. Roomba and dog poop don’t mix
Dog poop is the one challenge even robots can’t overcome.
10. You’ll never see white poop of your childhood again
It’s funny how the weirdest things can make us feel nostalgic.
11. Always expect seconds
You that moment when you’ve just dropped the baggie in the thrash, and your doggo poops out a marble they’ve been holding in for special occasions like these? Yeah, me too.
12. You don’t know horror until you experience the turd dangle
Deciding whether to remove it yourself or wait for your dog to smear it over their butt is almost worse than Sophie’s Choice.
13. Their poop might give you creepy crawlies
And I mean that literally.
14. Doggie butt compass can show you the way
Next time you are lost in the mountains, just ask your shitty little navigator to poop.
15. You need to pick it up as a champ
Unless you want to risk reincarnating as doggy doo.